Throwback: Life Changing
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Reposted from April 13, 2017 @restorationfamily.wordpress
It’s funny how sometimes you plan stuff a lot better than if you had tried. The kids’ Spring Break falls the week before Easter weekend and last through Monday so we had a New England Trek planned. At the end of January when I was trying to find a date for my eye surgery between all the schedules I landed on the week after break. I’m finding though that this eventful excursion is very distracting to my upcoming eye-opening date. The only reminders are the comments from my peanut gallery when I realize I can’t see something as well as the rest of the party. “Not for long,” they sing out.
One example, other than trying to read menus in low light, was when we were jumping across giant boulders out to a lighthouse at dusk. My depth perception fades dramatically in low light and apparently I was having to concentrate more than the 2 year old. The doctors I have seen about it and preparing for it have all said the same thing, “It will be life-changing”
I feel like the flip side to that is life threatening. Can something be life changing at the same time it is life threatening? Think of a moment where you stood at a crossroads or on a precipice. If you choose one way it will change your life but the other could destroy it. Maybe it’s something seemingly insignificant -a decision that you can now look back on and see how it changed or threatened your world. Maybe if you didn’t make that choice or change it would have destroyed…
I knew which week would work best for us but the doctor only performs surgery on Monday or Wednesday, rotating. That particular week was a Wednesday. I have to stop wearing my contacts 5 days before surgery which puts me back to Friday-the Friday before Easter Sunday-Good Friday.
The irony is not lost on me. Little encouragements to my faith. Both eyes at the same time. Life-Changing and Life {as I know it} Threatening. Jesus Christ was nailed to a Cross on Good Friday. He bled for me, for all of us. His life for ours. It’s Life-Changing.
God speaks to me, he speaks to my heart-he knows it. I cried, Lord your world is so vast. How do we know where to go? He gave me peace with an answer on college which led me to a boy from Kansas-or the boy to me. Kansas! really Lord? That’s so far from my home-in fact its in the dead center of the USA-when I was struggling with which end of the nation. He answers my cries with sweet songs, “Thy will be done” I woke a couple days ago with a mantra in the back of my mind, “Thy will for what I want.” It was pretty confusing as your clearing the sleep fog from your brain. But what a sweet prayer from my soul. “Lord I want your will for my life to be what I desire, what I want. I want to want what you want for me” I heard a small sermon from Andy Stanley’s Follow series a week ago with a similar message-my subconscious is working overtime!
Its so easy to feel out of control in a situation like this-the doctor, the equipment, the outcome. One thought that raced through as I keep mulling over “both eyes at the same time” is beauty in the world. This trip has been wonderfully serendipitous in that. The different colored and patterned mountains they blasted through to make the roads we have driven upon through 4 states. The different trees as they contrast with themselves in the forest and on the mountain or lakeside. The quaint little steeples in each town. The countryside is so different but so similar. I want to share it all, remember it all, document it all. “when the sun hits this ridge just right, these hills sing” (The Emperor’s New Groove)
SUNRISE-the time of day for new beginnings. Each one a gift. We take them for granted. Expect them. Feel we deserve them. Do we? We have a lot of dismal days where I live-cloudy to the point you don’t know what time of day it is. The whole day is the same gray color and there is no passing of time as the sun moves across the sky. Those days are tough. I found myself these past 3 years since coming back from New Mexico getting excited when the SUN makes an appearance. “Look, it’s the sun!” It’s become part of the toddler’s bedtime prayers, “Thank you for the sunshine…” I feel like this winter has had more sunshine-but maybe because I was focusing on the SUN instead of the gloomy days.
There is an old hymn that came to me,
Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.
Kind of annoying how things pop into your head. It’s hard for me to find time-uninterrupted time-to sit and write this. No distractions or thoughts of things to do. Just to sit and type away. I woke up this morning-on vacation-at 6:27 to a sunrise coming through a slit in the blackout curtains. I grabbed my camera-a sunrise over the Atlantic Ocean at a port in Maine. I won’t be here again for some time.
What if we noticed every SUNRISE? What if we noticed every SONRISE and not just acknowledged it on Easter weekend? Is it that hard to say thank you everyday? To recognize it daily? I hope I’m not here again. Here, taking for granted the rising of the sun/son.
I read in order to be considered an artist-you must make art. If you pull in the advice to take pictures daily or write everyday … you should theoretically be making art. You as in I – I should be crafting and creating everyday something. It’s not if I sell something or if I showcase something, it is just if I make something.
When your life is threatened it’s easier to see. See what you have been missing out on, see what you could have missed out on. It’s easier to be grateful. Today is the last day I will put contacts in to see. But I know that HE is NOT FINISHED with me. “Let us fix our eyes on Jesus,” Hebrews 12:2. It’s Life-Changing.
